As I mentioned before, we spent some time hanging out with people who live and work in Paris. We didn’t know any locals, so I turned to a site known for connecting people who love to travel and want to meet others along the way – CouchSurfing.org. The main purpose of CS is to find places to crash in your many travels around the world, but it also supports a community of people who just want to meet others. As such, it tends to attract people who are welcoming of random encounters with perfect strangers.
Random encounter is probably the best way to describe it, as not much planning went into it. I sent a message before we left, saying we’d like to meet up if they were interested. I got a very welcoming response with a phone number to call once we were in Paris. I didn’t call until we were a few days into our trip, but little did I know things would move quickly from there. It was about 7:30 on a Monday (or was it Tuesday?) night and Clo (3rd from left), asked if we would be interested in taking the metro to her and Joel’s (2nd from left) apartment to hang out. One thing led to another and before we knew it, it was 9:30 and we were sitting on their couch getting to know them and their two friends.
They were nice enough to share dinner and more than a few bottles of wine with us, so the first awkward “staring at each other” moments were pretty minimal. We learned a lot about each other before the conversation eventually lead into travel, politics and cultural differences between America and France. I would not describe language as a barrier, but since we didn’t know French and they had varying fluency in English, we would sometimes get entertainingly sidetracked about what to call (or how to explain) certain things.
In addition to meeting new people, I think we learned a lot about what make the French tick… and they hopefully learned the same about Americans. We come from similar, yet very different, cultures and our perspectives and perceptions are shaped accordingly. Here are a handful of things that made an impression on me.
- “I could just not drink one night a week and go to the gym.” This was said during our discussion about how Americans drive everywhere and then go to a specific place to exercise. The idea of gyms is still on the fringe in France and the comment was about how to make time to exercise. This comment is also amusing because a barrier to going to the gym was the consumption of alcohol (wine) every night. I explained that in America, someone who drinks every night would probably be labeled an alcoholic. The follow up conversation led into how it was commonplace to not only drink a decent amount of wine during the week, but also do it in the company of friends well into the night. A fact highlighted by the presence of both friends and wine bottles in the above picture.
- “You live in a house, like on TV?” The response when we said we lived in a townhouse in the suburbs. For them, the idea of cookie-cutter neighborhood America wasn’t much more than what they saw on television shows. Make your own social commentary.
- I was asked if the Nationals baseball we brought as a gift was real because it was so hard. I found it amazing they’d never held a baseball before, but then I realized I’d never held a cricket ball before I went to India. Like I said, perspective is everything.
- “It’s very Arabic… you know, welcoming.” That was Clo explaining what was so great about their three months in Syria. I probably don’t have to explain the irony in this statement but if I do, just watch any of the 24 hour news networks for about eight minutes.
- It’s not uncommon for the French to get 11 weeks vacation. They couldn’t believe I “only got three” and that it included sick leave. They said there was no way possible the French could get such a little amount. This is where people usually make a joke…
- The double-cheek kiss. Upon meeting them outside the metro station, I immediately went to shake hands while introducing myself. The behavior actually caught them off guard and I quickly realized my mistake. I then found out that not only was I unsure of cheek kiss protocol in general, I really wasn’t sure how to do it with complete strangers. I’m pretty sure I made a fool of myself.
All said, the evening was a very welcome change in scenery. We laughed, we learned and helped break down barriers… even if they were only our own. I’ve extolled the virtues of meeting locals (more than you probably cared to read) and the more I do it, the more I believe it. It’s not for everyone, I understand that, but I encourage you to do so if you have any inclination. What could go wrong?? <wink>